First and foremost, I hope this post finds you and your loved ones well. These are strange times we’re living in. I’m thankful to say that we’re healthy and relatively normal here at my house.

I was kinda sorta wondering – any of my friends out there had any interest in connecting virtually through a Zoom hangout? If I posted a meeting room invite would anyone show up? Or maybe you host a hangout yourself that you want to share?

It would be great if something good came out of this weird predicament we find ourselves in. We could talk about motorcycles, travel, roadside Americana, or I dunno, anything to lift the ole spirits. If we haven’t had the chance to meet in person, this could be fun. Or… a total shit show. Who knows?

Let me know what you think in comments below.

[edit] If you want to join, let me know what email address I should send the invite to. I can use the one you are commenting with or you can send me one to use through this comment form.

[edit edit] I’ll be sending out an email invite later this morning – 4/18/20.

Be well, be awesome,
R.

Say, “hello,” to my ride for the next few days. She’s a sister to my FZ07 back home.

This MT is a nice girl. She hasn’t had someone give her all the bells and whistles. That’s okay, nice girls are still fun.

My FZ feels and sounds like a brat in comparison.

This bone stock bike immediately showed its cards as being “easy.” Everything about it feels effortlessly soft. And it is so quiet, with my earplugs in I can barely hear that it’s running.

The Akrapovic can on my bike at home is so loud and sounds so yum-yum. I’ll admit I miss that familiar racket.

Riding along in the sunshine yesterday, this quiet, unassuming little lady felt zippy, small and fun. It’s such a great platform for an everyday rider.

Throwing my Kreiga 30 on the rear seat I can carry enough stuff to bum around for a pretty long while.

All in all, having this bike is a nice dose of familiarity. Plus, it’s at the bottom of the rental cost tier: $49 a day. A great deal.

Look at me, makin’ good choices!

It’s January 29, 2020. I’ve swiped this post from Instagram, where I originally made it. For this trip I’m on, I’ve only got my phone with me so my posts might be lacking some polish!

“Flourish. Whatever the conditions.”

File Under: Signs I needed to see.

After two years of being drugged into an unrecognizable version of myself on antidepressant, anti-anxiety and sleep medications, I’ve been med-free for a little over a month now. The truth is, I couldn’t stand being a ghost anymore.

In the beginning, I wouldn’t have survived without the drugs. But, much to my disappointment, they aren’t magic.

Right now, it feels like I don’t know myself anymore. I went from being hypersensitive to a numbed out shell. So I am, trying to relearn how to feel things while not being completely devastated by those feelings.

Unwisely, I skipped a dosage step-down and just went cold turkey. As a result, I had vertigo for a couple weeks which was miserable. I felt like I had the flu and on top of that, feeling things was… different.

There were moments when the withdrawal symptoms were really discouraging. The vertigo in particular was maddening. And there was also a feeling like a concussive noise like wind buffeting inside my head for a split second. This happened especially when I was tired. I hated being on the drugs, and I hated coming off the drugs.

I find it disturbing how much those pills fucked with my brain. And in hindsight, I can’t tell if they made certain behaviors worse or not. They really messed with my sleep, that I am certain of. I’ve been tired for two years. It makes me sad when I see photos of myself now, because I look it.

Since stopping the meds, I’ve been able to sleep without drugging myself for the first time in two years. If you’ve ever been on the hamster wheel of insomnia/sleep drugs, you know what a sweet relief this is.

Right now, in short – EVERYTHING HURTS. Every word, every look, every text, everything unsaid. I feel very “fuck everything, what’s the point?”

But,.. the little voice that keeps my feet moving forward is still in there somewhere prodding me along. So here I am. It hurts, but it isn’t unbearable. I’ve made it through worse.

One step forward…

It’s January 28, 2020. I’m writing this post on my phone while on a road trip in California. I’ve decided to forgo bringing my MacBook along on the last few rambles. It works out much better convenience-wise. But you also don’t get a great view of what you’re writing.

You’ll have to allow me a little leeway on polish and formatting, okay? Okay.