No one is born knowing how to do everything. No, each little baby that rolls off the assembly line and hurtles down the chute is just like you. They don’t know anything about anything until they get off their asses and figure it out. They get scared. They don’t now how things work. They feel unsure. The trick is turning that unknowingness into an opportunity to know.
As 2015 comes to a close, I sit here thinking about the new places that I traveled to, the whims I followed, new things I experienced, friends I’ve made – and I feel grateful. For someone who doesn’t do a whole lot, I did a whole lot. Maybe that’s because I felt a whole lot. If nothing is moving the needle on the ole feel-o-meter than all you’re left with is drudgery.
On the October morning when I took the photo above, I stood under those incredible clouds watching my breath steam away. I felt something. To the casual observer maybe all I was doing was standing on the side of that farm road. But through my eyes, there was magic in the sunrise. It felt like I was witnessing something glorious that was my secret. I stood there watching the sun finding its way through the cracks in the clouds and not taking no for an answer. I will shine through, damn it! Not everyone sees the sunrise. Some people only see something that makes them put the visor down in their car. See the sunrise.
This year, 2015, it changed me. Actually, I changed me. Long sleeping parts of myself awakened, dead weight jettisoned, and most importantly I kept hope’s pilot light lit.
That’s a big one, hope.
1. a feeling of expectation and desire for a certain thing to happen.
synonyms: aspiration, desire, wish, expectation, ambition, aim, goal, plan, design;
Maybe on the surface it seems like hope means leaving things to happen by chance or that whatever it is you are hoping for will come knocking on your door. But for me personally? That isn’t the case. There is work that piggybacks on hope. I think I like the synonym ambition most in that list.
Though I’d never really thought too deeply about it until recently, I have often felt that luck plays a big role in my life. The truth as I see it now is that I go after the things that I want. Anything that I’m proud of is something that I worked toward, it is something that I made happen. Could you say that luck played some part by putting me in the right place at the right time? Maybe. But if opportunity is looking you in the eye and you don’t take it – then you aren’t making good on the lucky break. Make your own luck. The lucky thing is the chance. You have to take it and then get to work.
In 2016, I hope to do more traveling. Travel won’t come knocking on my door so I’m going to have to get to work on making that happen.
Though I might’ve come apart at the seams for a minute there in 2015, I’m standing here now feeling pretty damn good.
Things I did in 2015
- I traveled
- I loved
- I felt
- I took chances
- I held things close
- I let things go
- I meant something
- I fell down, fell apart, fell to pieces
- I got back up
- I was loved
- I tried
- I failed
- I triumphed
- I was scared
- I was brave
- I hoped
- I wondered
- I was curious
- I am grateful