I just need a moment to be honest and to get this stuff off my chest. Maybe some of you can relate.
I had a great time this past weekend doing the Berkshire Big Adventure dual sport ride. I found it to be pretty challenging at times and introduced me to terrain that would have been outside of what I would say is my comfort zone. I managing to keep myself upright and rode through to the end. I wasn’t fast, but I got there eventually.
Overall I felt good about my riding and thought I made some progress. Until the following day when I began to watch videos of the ride. Holy crap.
I … Suck
Now with the gift of hindsight and video to back me up, I find it depressing. I just want to pack up all of my dirt gear and put it out at the curb for the garbage man to haul away.
Video is a blessing and a curse.
In our group no one at any time did or said anything to make me feel like I was an anchor. As a matter of fact, they gave me a lot of encouragement when I would make it to where they were waiting at the end of each trail section. But damn it, watching the videos back and seeing just how long they were waiting for me in some cases was absolutely cringe-worthy.
I feel terribly embarrassed.
The point of riding isn’t to compare yourself with others. I’ve been riding motorcycles long enough to know this. But here I am a noob all over again and find myself asking – when moving with a group, how can you do anything but? When you are the cause of people having to wait or worse yet worry, it can be hard to just brush it off.
Finding the time to go to an organized event for busy people with families can be tough. I just cant help but wonder – if you make them stand around waiting for you would they prefer if you didn’t ride along with them?
I don’t know if I’m cut out for this type of riding. It seems like I lack the right constitution or something. Maybe this off road business isn’t for me?
Embarrassed on Long Island