Officer: “Yo. We got reports of sexy bitches tearin’ shit up in here. That you?”

Me: “Seriously? Who ELSE could it be?”

Officer: “Word.”

Me: “That it?”

Officer: “Yeah.”

Me: “Peace out, playa.”

I’m paraphrasing.

Thankfully he didn’t want to see my license. Remember what happened the last time I got stopped by the cops? Eesh.

I was tickled pink to find out that it would fit over my pressure suit. Between the already huge, distracting knockers, the plastic boob-guards and a back protector, I’ve got a lot going on in the rack department.

This particular shirt actually has a cape that velcros on to the shoulders. I thought maybe the cape would be a little too much for this ride. You know, because I didn’t want to look silly.

I usually carry my wallet and or phone in a Ziploc baggie and shove it in my pocket or in my tankbag when I’m on my dirtbike. A top notch waterproofing system for electronics, my bankcard and license, right?

I just happened to see this Outdoor Recreation box while I was looking for something else. With the Big Berkshire Aventure 2-day ride coming up, I thought – for less than $10 bucks, what the hell? It might be better than the baggie-method. Especially when the opportunity exists to fall over in things like:

and

IMPORTANT:
Product not intended to be submerged. Product is not intended for microwave or freezer use. Not for storing food or water.

I don’t know if I should worry about the fact that the label on the box says not to submerge it. Or microwave it. (Um, okay?) I’m just going to throw caution to the wind and hope for the best. Hopefully, having my wallet in the box will have the same voodoo as having all the correct tools or rain gear on the bike – I won’t need it.

You can pick up the box at Walmart (which I hate) for around $6 -or-  the cost of a box of Ziploc gallon sized bags.

Cross your fingers for me!

I finally picked up a copy of American Borders by Carla King. It is the saga of her circumnavigation of the United States on a then newly imported Ural sidecar rig.

In just the first chapter there was romance, motorcycles, adventure and awakening… can’t wait to see what the rest of the tale has in store!

Have you read American Borders?

• CarlaKing.com
• Carla on Twitter & Facebook

You missed me, didn’t you?
Just go along with it even if you didn’t. It’s good for my battered self esteem.

In the couple of weeks since I last posted, I’ve actually ridden my motorcycle quite a lot. For some reason, I just haven’t taken the time to write about it.  That really goes against the whole premise of being a blogger, doesn’t it? I told you I like to live on the edge.

So, What’s New?

The Ural

Things on the Ural front are status quo. The 3-wheeled smile machine is still happily chugging along bringing sunshine to the masses. No problems with it, since some folks have asked. ::knocks wood:: 

I get it – but it always bugs me when people ask if anything has gone wrong with it. It’s just a little douchey. If something craps out on it, you guys will be the first to know.

I am still in awe with just how people react to the big orange girl. It is always met with a smile. And that… makes me happy.

The Tiger

My sick Tiger was all fixed up a few weeks ago.

Remember how the “thingy” had been wonky by the ignition? Well it turned out a wire inside had broken loose. Why? Who knows? And really, I don’t care. All I know is the Tiger and I were reunited and it feels so good.

That should cover your Peaches and Herb quota for the month.

The Berkshire Big Adventure

It’s almost time for the 2013 Berkshire Big Adventure ride – my favorite ride of the year. This year it is a two-day event so I’m all sorts of excited about that.

Berkshire Big Adventure
AMA National 2 Day Adventure Ride
May 18-19, 2013

Seeing as how I haven’t ridden my Husky offroad in months, I am expecting to be really rusty. Being rusty when you already suck at something… well, that should bring about some interesting results. Ah, what the hell. I’m hoping for the best!

You can find some old posts about the BBA here:

• 2012 Berkshire Big Adventure Ride
• 2011 Berkshire Big Adventure Dual Sport
• Berkshire Big Adventure Dual Sport Ride

And our video from 2011 that I just love to recycle because it was so much fun:

The Minuteman 1000

I’ve had to withdraw from doing the Minuteman Rally because I still haven’t mastered being in 3 places at once. Oh well, whaddayagonnado?

Equinox to Equinox Rally

I’m still riding around taking pictures of things for the E2E Rally.

I’ve been trying to get off of the Island to pick up some points and leave the local stuff for when I have less time to get out.

The downside of this plan is that I fucking hate the Long Island Expressway at this point and am sick of making the hour long slog to get off this island. Cue violins. But, that’s the price I have to pay for living in paradise! Oh. Right.

—————–

So – that’s what happening around here.

How About You?

Trips, events, rallies – what are you up to?

Sunday was a bit on the chilly side. Of course that meant a perfect opportunity to torture Kenny by dragging him out to breakfast 150 miles away.

The lovely Collin’s Diner in North Canaan, Connecticut is nestled between not 1 but 2, yes 2 cabooses (caboosii?).

I had no idea – it was just a lucky break.

I’d call that a win, wouldn’t you? Delicious breakfast in the type of diner where the waitresses call you “hon” and 14 E2E static train points.

For whatever reason, the static train is one of my favorite categories in the Rally. I’m kind of surprised that I never really took note of just how many train cars are sitting idle before now.

Along our route into Connecticut we passed many opportunities to collect points for the E2E Rally. But I just didn’t feel like stopping for them. I find it much more difficult to stop and monkey around on the side of the road when I’m traveling with someone.

Instead I filed some things away for ‘later’ when I have time to see them on my own. This of course goes against my resolution for the New Year. What can I say? I live on the edge. I’m a rule breaker.

Later today I may even run with scissors.

Most of the time I don’t need a reminder. But with my eyes and ears glued to the news lately, I can allow myself to get overwhelmed.

Even through all the sadness in the world, there are blessing and so many things to be happy about. Yesterday I asked my Facebook friends to share some of the good things in their day with me. With responses ranging from weddings, to the happiness of their children, to simply being alive – they were able to focus and share their happiness.

So, how about it? Tell me what’s good in your world.

…assuming we don’t break down on the way.

Oh. In case you were wondering? Slowest drag race EVER!

But sometimes… sometimes you just don’t feel like “working.” So, I’ve been taking it easy and making an effort to stop and see some of the places I’ve been visiting and not just doing drive-by point collecting.

Lately the thing that has been capturing my attention is – old cemeteries.

I don’t know what it is about about certain places or things that makes you have an affinity for them. Is it the place itself? Is it what is represents? Is it strictly the visual experience? Maybe it is all of those things?

The information carved on old grave stones can be surprisingly deep – the cause of death, age in years months and sometimes days. I read one stone that said the young boy buried was killed by a wagon wheel. Way to embarrass the kid for eternity.

This stone from Piscatawaytown Burial Ground in NJ was pretty descriptive – mushrooms!

Stone Reads:
Spataters under neath this tomb lies 2 boyes that lay in one womb the eldest was full 13 year old yongest was V twice told by eating mushroms for food rare in a day(s) time they poyseond were Richard Hoop(ar) and Charles Hoopar desesed august anno dom 1693

Apparently the type of stone, the decorative imagery and lettering itself give clues to who the local carver was. I’ve just put my toe in the next to water researching information about stones on Long Island. It’s fascinating.

So what is it that makes me keep looking at these old burial grounds? I wish I knew. I don’t find them morbid or anything. On the contrary the spaces are often peaceful and a place of quiet reflection. These people were here. They walked the Earth, they mattered to someone.

During the week I rode to a burial ground in the town of Coram. It was a little less cared for than I would have hoped. Many broken stones, some trash, lots of leaves and bits of tree branches laying throughout it. The sign at the entry way is hanging on by a thread and a prayer.

I parked and walked up the small hill in to the grounds and wound up meeting a gentleman who was also there looking through the stones. We struck up a nice conversation and talked about other old burial grounds on Long Island. He was a very nice fellow.

So, my single friends – if you don’t know where to go to meet a nice man or woman? Cemetery.

You’re welcome.

But, plans changed back at home and so I stayed out longer than I originally anticipated. It was cool but sunny, so I was only too happy to be exploring.

I lingered around near the Grounds for Sculpture to see ‘America the Beautiful,’ an homage to Grant Wood’s American Gothic.

And the dancers across the way…

I was flittering about exploring old cemeteries, looking for parked trains and other roadside odds and ends.

In the process of doubling back to take a picture of a boat-sized banana split, a lady who decided that she didn’t need to use her mirrors or her eyeballs while behind the wheel decided to back up in the parking lot without looking. She came within inches of knocking me over. I went to honk my horn and… nothing? What the hell?

In that immediate irrational thinking moment, I figured I just didn’t hear the horn because I had music on and the wind was blowing. It seemed impossible that the horn wouldn’t work. But, hey, guess what? When I pressed the button again? Nada.

Ever the optimist, I thought it had to be a fuse or something. I resigned myself to taking a look at it when I got home and went on about my day.

My Tiger Isn’t Feeling Well

Never once did I consider that along with my horn, none of my lights would be working either. I rode around for the whole day? Part of the day? Who knows – with no headlight and no tail/brake light. Scary!

The dashboard was fully lit up, the sun was up and so I didn’t pick up any visual cues that I had a greater problem. Now in hindsight I realize I could have looked for my own headlight reflection in the back on another car. But I didn’t. My life is a cautionary tale.

When I got home, Kenny immediately started poking around on my bike while I shed my gear. If you allow the bars to sit at straight ahead, unturned position – the lights and horn failed. If the bars were turned the bars to the right – everything worked. Turn to the left, nothing.

I don’t want you guys to think I’ve gone all smart and stuff so I will be using my usual technical language here.

There is a “thingy” below the ignition key tumbler that seems to be the culprit. If you press it up towards the key, everything works with the bars in any position. If you don’t press that “thingy” everything only works when the bars are turned to the right.

I’ve got to call the dealer tomorrow to see if I can get my bike in ASAP.

In the meantime, Kenny has cleared his Tiger for me to use – you know – if I should find myself in some type of rally emergency situation where I need to visit a giant elephant in south Jersey or something.

I have to say, it’s kind of handy having a husband that rides, too.